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Carter’s Grand Entrance: My Birth Story 2013

As a mother of two the days of can easily get away from you, and quickly. I truly adore my two but after a long day it seems I can only gush over their preciousness when they’re in a peaceful state of slumber. It almost brings me to tears at how fast they grow. The fact that these amazing beings came from me is nothing short of a miracle in my mind. I wish I could stop time and capsulate their innocence and the art of discovery each holds in their eyes. As my boys continue to increase in size and knowledge I can’t help but think about when they were all mine and mine alone. The time when they were safe in Mommy’s womb, surrounded in love with everything they ever needed, which apparently included all my energy and ability to breathe. With those kind of accommodations who’d ever want to leave, right? Wrong. Here you’ll find the events that led up to Carter’s grand entrance.

Let me first start off by giving you some background into my first labor experience. Honestly speaking it was one of the easiest days of my life. I woke up around six in the morning feeling funny. Felt some mild cramping in my lower abdomen, timed it for about 45 minutes to ensure they were regular. Drove myself 3 minutes down the road to the hospital to make sure it was the real deal. I made it to triage without incident. From triage to the L&D room. I received a lovely body numbing sedative, took a nap, woke up, pushed and had a Braylon, May 27, 2010.

Carters-Birth-2-2
This time was TOTALLY DIFFERENT!!!!
My labor process started about a week before the actual labor began. My due date was October 20, 2013 and my thought was, I had Braylon a couple of days earlier than his due date, so for sure this little guy will follow suit. I estimated a push date around October 17th so in preparation for baby Carter’s highly anticipated arrival I began to self induce. I got a pedicure (which triggered my last labor), had my feet rubbed, RUBBED MY OWN FEET, ran the treadmill, walked the stairs and after it all I was either extremely relaxed or exhausted when it was time for bed. But day after day I lye awake at night forcing my mind into believing maybe that kick was really a contraction, to no avail. I’m also guilty of prepping my parents, “Get ready, I think tonight’s the night.” I was so confident in my theory, that I purposely missed my last two doctors appointments. Needless to say, October 20th came and went. I was slipping into a mild depression that no one around me seemed to understand. I made a doctors appointment for October 22nd. I was one cm dilated, given paperwork for an induction on the 27th. I asked the doc, “What are the chances I’ll go into labor tonight being one cm dilated?” “Close to none but still possible”, he stated. Well… That’s exactly what happened.

October 22, 10:00 p.m. – October 23, 1:30 a.m. – I laid down to watch TV and felt that familiar feeling. My Spid-E senses were telling me that this was it but I felt like the girl who cried wolf so I was reluctant to say a word. After about an hour I informed all necessary parties and continued to wait for that pains to come closer together. Ten o clock turned into twelve and twelve to one. I told Daddy to be it was time to go. No rush, no drama, I just think now would be best. Sometime between leaving the house and getting to the hospital THINGS GOT REAL!!! I could no longer talk through the contractions. I sacrificed a speedy trip for comfort.

2:15 a.m. – When we finally made it to triage we played a game of 20 questions before I was assigned a bed. I waited seemingly forever to see the triage nurse that would eventually admit me to a L&R room. When she made it we went yet another round of 20 questions, she checked me (oh the agony!), two cm (SMH). The good thing is they are convinced I was in labor so they were going to admit me (YAY!) the bad news is before they can do that they must first administer an IV. Note: For those whose never had a baby, if you want an epidural all roads lead to an IV. Maybe I’m the only one who hates them but let’s say you don’t mind them. Picture this, you’re being tortured from your insides with pain that makes you want to crawl up in a ball and die and you’re being asked to hold still and extend your arm as the poke you with a giant needle. Who wants to go first? That’s what I thought. Times that by four (attempts) two different nurses, 10 contractions and several tears later, it was finally done. Due to my “rolling veins” I now have the most awkwardly placed IV in my upper arm.

4:30 a.m. – Shuttled to my L&R room for the highly anticipated numbing agent. Last round of 20 questions with a pain that I can be described as my young baby twerking on all my vital organs. Soon the medicine man came in to shut the party down and within minutes my body was floating on cloud nine. Let me further explain. I know what you’re thinking and it’s not the happy relief you might have in mind. No, my body was so numb that I felt like I was levitating atop the bed. The dosage of medicine given must have been a little too much but I didn’t say a word. I was so afraid that I if I told I’d go back to the pain I once felt.

Carters-Birth-25:20 a.m. – Not long after my medicine my parents came with big brother to be and boy was he excited. He was well educated in the process in which his baby brother would come. I told him throughout my pregnancy that Mommy would go to the hospital to puuuuush him out. Every prenatal appointment I went to he thought it was brother time. So when I saw him that morning I sat him alongside of me in the hospital bed to joyously confirm his suspicions. He was seemingly excited but I was apprehensive not knowing how he would really react to the new member of our family. Before I could get too caught up on that thought he was ready to get down and Daddy said, “It’s time to take a mini nap.” being that it was so early in the morning. They both laid down together as I caught my parents up on the horror story that was my labor pre epidural. Finished recounting my tale I tried to lye down and rest as father and son sleep peacefully alongside of each other and my parents went to wait in the hospitals appointed area.

9:00 a.m. – Next thing I know I’m fully dilated and the nurses come in with all their sterile tools and begin to setup shop. They call for my doctor who was luckily on call and once he arrived the nurse broke my water and it was push time. Daddy to be nervously looked on although we’d be through this before. I guess two is different than one. Feet in the stirrups I follow my doctors directions inhaling a large dose of air to the lungs and push like my life depended on it. Three pushes later at 9:32 a.m. I was staring into the eyes of an angel. All 7 lbs 13 ounces and 18 inches of him. I cried uncontrollably, for this was the moment I’d been waiting on for so long. After the commotion died down, Daddy ran out to bring big brother in and the uniting of our family, Mommy, Daddy, big brother, and baby was the most complete I’ve felt in some time. In that moment everything was well in the world. I could have come unglued all over again but I know that big brother may have been frightened by it. I have no idea how I held it together. It was so beautiful and pure. Braylon shyly came in, introducing himself, announcing his brand new title, Big Brother. The thought even still gives me chills. All the worries that kept me up at night were now gone. I knew in my heart that everything was just as it was suppose to be.

Carters-Birth-1

What was your birthing experience like? To share the good, the bad, and the painful comment below. We’d love to hear it!

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    From Pregnancy to Motherhood: A Journey of Love

    It’s a great pleasure of mine to present to you the Journeys of a New Mommy with entries from the author of Memoirs of a Dreamer and new/ sleep deprived mother, Ferrell Fellows. Join Ferrell in the peaks and valleys that is motherhood. Each entry will detail lessons learned as woman, mother, and wife. This is sure to be a fun ride. Buckle up!

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    The idea of motherhood is an ambivalent notion. One surrounded in so much uncertainty that a woman can read every book on the subject matter and never truly comprehend what it means.  I remember seeing the two blue lines on my pregnancy test and the reality of motherhood still evaded me. It didn’t come after the weeks and weeks of nauseated fatigue nor did it come with the endless discomforts of tingling legs, itchy palms, back pain, hip pain, and exploding rib pain. I gave up my favorite cocktail for cold glasses of milk and popped vitamins round the clock on behalf of my unborn child. I decorated the room, fitted sheets to the crib as I rubbed my ever-growing abdomen that inhibited sleep and left me awake with nothing to do but think. Even then, I still couldn’t imagine it. Exasperated, I clenched through 36 hours of contractions while all of my willpower an emotion centered on evicting the fetus that had taken over my body for the last nine months and ending the excruciating waves of pain. Motherhood didn’t become real until the sixth of February at 3:07pm – the moment they laid Kingson on my chest, heart to heart, and I felt his tiny palm wrapped around my finger and saw his eyes looking up at mine. I had created something and it was now here on this earth, living and breathing, and for this very moment I knew that I was created.

    Motherhood is not an easy job. It’s only been 12 days and my whole world has been turned upside down. My life is his life. Everything he needs takes precedence over my needs. The tiniest grunt arouses my complete attention. I’m at his beck and call, his willing servant, because my only job is to make him happy and content and at peace in this world. People warned me of the sleepless nights that every new parent faces and I wish that I had listened. Between the last weeks of pregnancy, the days of labor, the revolving door of visitors, diaper changes, and feedings I literally went without sleep the first week of my son’s life. They didn’t warn me that I would also go without bath and toothbrush, and that the routine of my life based upon 28 years of practice would be completely rearranged by someone who hadn’t even been in my life for 28 days. The dynamic in my household is changing as I used to be the one laying in my husband’s arms at night, now I’m not the only object of his affection. We have to relearn how to sleep and eat and live together all while raising this beautiful person we made together. I pray for grace as I learn and make mistakes because I feel the total responsibility of Kingson’s life in my hands. I am his mother.

     

    It’s not something that you can prepare for completely, but surprisingly you’re ready to be a mom at the exact moment you become one. As soon as my son came into the world I knew that I had everything I needed to care for him, instinctually my maternal love came out and I just knew how to love him the way he needed. As a new mother you will have moments of doubt, wondering if he is breathing as he sleeps silently in his crib… or if he’s eating enough to be healthy. But deep down inside you just know that everything is okay. As long as he’s in your arms, he’s protected. I’m at the beginning of this journey, but it is truly a journey of love. I’ve never known anyone to love me so freely and so completely and I’ve never given love so deeply as I have now.

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